Because whining about it makes it all better.

I have a somewhat thoughtful post on Ted Haggard and meth-fueled trysts coming sometime soon, but before I write that, you'll have to excuse me, 'cause I've got some complaining to do.

The last five months have been some of the worst in recent Wisconsin sports history. It's one thing when your teams are just plain horrible, so you can quit caring about them. It's quite another when they tease you in every single game by losing at the last second. And I can't remember another year when that's happened to my teams as much as this one.

The Packers were the worst offenders, with an epically heartbreaking season. They had nine games that went down to the final two minutes or overtime, and they lost eight of them, including a streak of four straight games in which they blew a late fourth-quarter lead. They had an eight-game stretch this season in which they were outscored by just six points total, but somehow ended up with a record of 1-7. The NFL stat gurus Football Outsiders did an analysis just before the last week of the season showing that the Packers were the unluckiest NFL team in the last 27 years. I've never followed a season like that, where every time your team got a lead, you were so resigned to the fact that they'd eventually lose it--and they proved you right every single time. It's just not fun to have your pessimism backed up so consistently.

(Badger football, of course, was awful, too, though not quite in as gut-wrenching fashion as the Packers. They lost six times, with three of those losses coming on last-minute scores. But they also won three close ones, too. All in all, they weren't an unlucky team--just a horrible one.)

Then came winter, and with it, Badger basketball. This was supposed to be a down year for the Badgers, but nowhere near this painful. Back while football season was going on and no one was paying attention, they split a couple of close games, winning by a basket against two teams (Iona and Idaho State) that shouldn't have been able to hang with them and losing two tight ones against top teams (Marquette and Texas). Then came the conference season, and specifically the last four games. The Badgers lost two straight in overtime, then two more in the last minute to bring their losing streak to five, their longest in more than a decade. This quite thoughtful Badger fan's response after the most recent of those losses sums up my thoughts on Tuesday perfectly.

Oh, and Nebraska basketball? They've led big-time programs throughout most of their last three games, only to fall short in the final two minutes. Tom Osborne had to give them a pep talk this week to tell them, basically, that things can't possibly get any worse.

But enough of my whining. At least we still have Husker football, right? Those lucky dogs.

Nebraska-VT tidbits

As promised, thoughts from the Nebraska-Virginia Tech game:

--There really is nothing in sports (that I've seen, anyway) like the atmosphere at a big-time college football game. The sheer volume of noise, the band, the student section, the red, everything. I've never been to an NFL game, but they all look so sterile in comparison. (Except for games at Lambeau, of course--I've heard that's the closest place to a college environment in an NFL stadium.)

--We sat on the floor, about 10 or 12 feet behind the Virginia Tech bench, with the other Red Cross Day volunteers. Let me just say I was not impressed with the Virginia Tech defensive players. During Tech's nail-in-the-coffin drive on offense (the one with the three personal-foul penalties), they were standing on the bench and would turn around to the crowd and pose or yell at us. There were state troopers standing between us and them to make sure we didn't taunt them or otherwise interfere with them. That job becomes a little bit tougher when the players you're protecting are the ones initiating the taunting.

--Nate Swift's punt return in the fourth quarter--wow. I had to watch it on Huskervision (we couldn't see over the VT sideline), but that was still the coolest play I've ever seen live.

--Before the game, Erin Andrews set up shop a few feet away from us. She's ESPN's top sideline reporter and the hottie du jour in the sports Internet world. (I would tell you to Google her, but you will feel violated if you do. And for the record, she seems pretty cool--takes her job seriously, hasn't posed for Playboy or anything--though Dana and I agreed her pants at the game were almost comically too tight.) At first I was annoyed because bunches of guys my age and pervy middle-aged guys were crowding around her (which also meant crowding around us) with their camera phones at the ready. But she spent the whole game on the actual sidelines, so that turned out not to be a problem. But it was funny to watch as she walked behind the line of guys leaning over the sideline fence to watch warmups, and one by one they snapped their necks around after she passed as you could see them going, "Whoa, wait--that was Erin Andrews!" It cracked me up.

--That was the fifth Husker game I've seen live, and the fourth that they've lost. Still, as far as the overall experience went, it was more fun than any of the first four. (The one win, Iowa State last year, wasn't too hard to top.) Just think how much more fun it'll be when this team actually starts playing well.

I wonder what this would have looked like in graph form...

A brief summary of my weekend in sports (all times approximate, and by approximate, I mean nudged around for maximum dramatic effect):

Saturday:
3 p.m.: Mets win, forcing the Brewers to win in order to maintain their one-game wild card lead.

5:30 p.m.: Brewers lose. They've just blown their wild card lead with one game to go.

6:15 p.m.: Badgers lose. They've just blown a 19-0 second-half lead against possibly the worst Michigan team in decades.

10:45 p.m.: Huskers lose. They've just been beaten at home in the first meaningful game in the Bo Pelini era.

Sunday:
2 p.m.: Aaron Rodgers, the Packers' quarterback, gets injured during a game against the Buccaneers. The quarterback the Packers turned Brett Favre down for has just gone down.

2:30 p.m.: Aaron Rodgers returns. And throws his third interception of the day.

2:45 p.m.: Mets tie their game, 2-2. If they win, the Brewers have to win in order to avoid missing the playoffs in the biggest collapse in franchise history.

2:50 p.m.: The Brewers are losing, 1-0, in the seventh inning after being one-hit by a bunch of relievers through six. They have the bases loaded with Corey Hart up. He strikes out.

2:51 p.m.: Packers lose.


At this point, we have what could be the worst sports weekend of my life. Badgers, Huskers and Packers lose, and the Brewers are about to blow the best chance they'll have at the playoffs for years. But all is not lost: If the Brewers can clinch the playoffs, I'll consider the weekend salvaged. This is what I tell Dana, anyway. She seems skeptical.


2:52 p.m.: Craig Counsell (AKA 12-year-old looking, goofy-stance-man) draws a game-tying RBI walk for the Brewers. (This is where the links get fun.)

3:30 p.m.: The Mets fall behind, 4-2, in the eighth inning on back-to-back home runs.

3:35 p.m.: Ryan Braun hits a two-run home run to put the Brewers in the lead, 3-1.

3:45 p.m.: Brewers win.

4:00 p.m.: Mets lose. Brewers make the playoffs for the first time since Dad used to swear at Brewers games. (Yes, it's tough for me to believe, too.)

I call it a pretty good weekend.

I hate to post yet another sports post, but Dana and I went to the Husker game, and I'll have some thoughts on that up tomorrow.